celebrities buzzed

1 04 2008

this selective war against drugs aimed at the cast of “Gilligan’s Island” must stop….

first, it was Gilligan — busted a few years ago. now Mary Ann. like we didn’t already know that they got high. no need to arrest her and then put her picture on tv. this ruined the fantasies of millions of male cable fans who didn’t know she is a senior citizen now.

i heard a rumor about Thurston Howell III – a known boozer, as was the Skipper… but could he also be a pot head and swinger? just because he hung around with Bob Crane? why would that matter?

so Lovey was a cokehead… who cares? The Professor used the nose candy every now and then… he also liked hallucinogenics and weed. lots of weed. i heard he had grow lights in his shed. he could still make a radio out of a coconut.

Ginger, well, we could all tell she would take whatever was there. she looks pretty high when trying to seduce Gilligan, which might explain why she would seduce Gilligan.

i feel like the cast of any old sitcom could be next. surely Lucille Ball was high as hell.

when will it end?





a moment of self-discovery

25 02 2008

i realized i was a pot head when i noticed my bong was cleaner than my dishes! i felt so enlightened by this newfound knowledge that i actually considered washing them….

i had never considered that before!

after all, my motivation is low because my mind is high… or that’s what they would have you believe. the TRUTH is i’m lazy. even when i’m straight.





dude, where’s my car keys?

23 02 2008

okay. i cannot find my car keys. i have looked everywhere. i don’t know where i put them…

who was the comedian who said after he stopped smoking weed he thought he was psychic because he would look in his pocket and find his keys? i have no idea. But I bet that is exactly how it feels.

thank god i wasn’t going anywhere.





but it looks real…

22 02 2008

“Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of good weed.” — unknown (too lazy to research it!)





wait

21 02 2008

i forgot what i came in here for…





gas prices suck (money outta my wallet)

20 02 2008

i am really pissed about gas prices… in my area they are closing in on $3 per gallon. that is too much!

on the other hand, a peanut butter sandwich sounds really good right now.